Dating a former nun

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But when God approaches as Avenger and Judge, the soul who rejected Him will hate Him, as we hate Him.

(7) That soul hates Him with all the strength of its perverse will.

I then dreamed that I arose at six to go to morning Mass in the house chapel. My fingers trembled, and my mind was so shaken I couldnt even think to say an Our Father.

Upon opening the door of my room, I stepped on a parcel containing the pages of a letter. I felt like I was suffocating, and needed open air to breathe.

In my youth, I had a friend, Anne, who lived near my house. I prayed fervently for the eternal rest of her soul and offered my Holy Communion for that intention.

That is to say, we were mutually attached as companions and co-workers in the same office. We never had what can be called a real friendship, but rather an amiable relationship. Throughout the day I was unsettled, and that night I slept fitfully.

The blessed in Heaven must necessarily love Him, for they constantly behold Him in His awe-inspiring beauty. We know this, and that knowledge fills us with fury. The believer I say this seething with fury who contemplates and meditates upon Christ extended on the Cross will love Him.Hence even though they will some good, they do not will it well so that one is not able to call their will good on that account. You helped me out many times, and frequently gave me good advice while you were training me. The disgrace of my conception was due to their carelessness. 3: "Although not to be is very evil in so far as it removes being, it is very good in so far as it removes unhappiness, which is the greatest if evils, and thus it is preferred not to be."Before my parents married, they had moved away from their country villages to the city and drifted away from the Church, making friends with others who had fallen away from the practice of the faith.When I was born, my two sisters were already 14 and 15 years of age. I wish I could annihilate myself at this moment and escape these torments! They met at a dance, and six months later they were obliged to get married.It hates Him eternally, by virtue of its deliberate resolution to reject God with which it ended its earthly life. 8, sf 1, iba 5, r: "The damned do not hate God except because He punishes and forbids what is agreeable to their evil will [the evil that they still desire to do]: and consequently they will think of Him only as punishing and forbidding." I am forced to add that even now God is still merciful to us.This perverse act of the will can never be revoked, nor would we ever want to do so. I say forced because even though I willingly write this letter, I cannot lie as I would like to.

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